would anyone really miss me?-suicide warning-.....

ok so im having suicidal thoughts again my story in my head helps drive them away becausen it makes meh happy but.... what i want to know is would any of you miss me  i mean everyone at school hates me exept the dgroup im in and i mean they bring up muy spirits some but.... i just think it be better if i died i meanno one at the school would care or even notice.... i mean all i am is a toy to them a way to make themselves seem more important, dominan t and stuff and i never talk about it or write it down... son tuff bottles up and chance just wants to seem more tough...... and then alot of people like shane, and others from my elementary school would be happy unless they reallly cared about me bu i...i just want to die its all stuck in my head and i.... i really want to die ..... peopled think im unatractive and even when i try and look beautiful or anything or werar my hair norma;l they always find something......

i don't know if i willl maby if i watchedc some porn it might help but still i.... wish theyed alll just stop i tont fioght back i dont nmake fun of them... why me does everyone there just want a verbal punching bag?

ima stop there just tell me if you care not like it matters mirures my only true friend i have and we are online friends at that.